Every time I write a story I come across things that frustrate or annoy me. It can be big or small. Important or inconsequential. It can be a long, well thought out analysis of my writing or a snarky snippet of a fleeting thought. But, once a thought is in my head, it’s there. I thought it could be fun to write it down. See how long the list will be before I finish this story. This is not meant to be taken seriously. If anything appears to be overly self-critical, take it with a grain of salt. My head is a snarky place. I’m putting the words down here to make them harmless and something I can laugh at, instead of giving them power over me.
1. There are no moose on Kodiak Island.
2. The roof on Kodiak airport is NOT red. That’s the hotel next to it, stupid.
3. The hunting regulations in Alaska are very, very complicated.
4. Field dressing meat – that is – skinning and taking out the innards of a dead animal is disgusting. Don’t watch any more videos and never hunt. In fact, for future reference, never write stories with hunting in it again.
5. The bar can’t be on the beach because the coastline is super high cliffs. You can’t get down on the beach.
6. No matter how much research you think you’ve done, it’s not enough. It’s never enough.
7. Don’t undervalue the punctuation mark. For fuck sake woman, use it.
8. Stop writing “a bit” all the damn time! You know you’ll edit it out.
9. Yes, you suck at grammar, BUT the editing program isn’t always right, trust your own judgment.